You can’t let praise or criticism get to you. It’s a weakness to get caught up in either one. John Wooden
Critics are those who have failed in literature and art. Benjamin Disraeli
The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism. Norman Vincent Peale
If you’re not failing now and again, it’s a sign you’re not doing anything very innovative. Woody Allen
I’ve been reading reviews of my stories for twenty-five
years, and can’t remember a single useful point in any of them, or the
slightest good advice. Anton Chekhov
I tell writers to keep reading, reading, reading. Read
widely and deeply. And I tell them not to give up even after getting
rejection letters. And only write what you love. Anita Diamant
Rejection slips, or form letters, however tactfully
phrased, are lacerations of the soul, if not quite inventions of the
devil—but there is no way around them. Isaac Asimov
The artist doesn’t have time to listen to the critics.
The ones who want to be writers read the reviews, the ones who want to
write don’t have the time to read reviews. William Faulkner
Was I bitter? Absolutely. Hurt? You bet your sweet ass I
was hurt. Who doesn’t feel a part of their heart break at rejection. You
ask yourself every question you can think of, what, why, how come, and
then your sadness turns to anger. That’s my favorite part. It drives me,
feeds me, and makes one hell of a story. Jennifer Salaiz
I used to save all my rejection slips because I told
myself, one day I’m going to autograph these and auction them. And then I
lost the box. James Lee Burke
I think that you have to believe in your destiny; that
you will succeed, you will meet a lot of rejection and it is not always a
straight path, there will be detours — so enjoy the view. Michael York
I went for years not finishing anything. Because, of course, when you finish something you can be judged. Erica Jong
As a writer, the worst thing you can do is work in an environment of fear of rejection. Carol Leifer
Criticism is something we can avoid easily by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing. Aristotle
I could write an entertaining novel about rejection slips, but I fear it would be overly long. Louise Brown
The
first thing you have to learn when you go into the arts is to learn to
cope with rejection. If you can’t, you’re dead. Warren Adler
I had immediate success in the sense that I sold
something right off the bat. I thought it was going to be a piece of
cake and it really wasn’t. I have drawers full of — or I did have —
drawers full of rejection slips. Fred Saberhagen
An absolutely necessary part of a writer’s equipment,
almost as necessary as talent, is the ability to stand up under
punishment, both the punishment the world hands out and the punishment
he inflicts upon himself. Irwin Shaw
To defend what you’ve written is a sign that you are alive. William Zinsser
Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement. C. S. Lewis
I’ve certainly stumbled a lot, but that’s how you figure things out.
The first book (4 Hour Work Week) was turned down by 26 publishers.
Get good at being a troublemaker and saying sorry when you really screw up.
When everything and everyone is failing, what is the cost of a little experiment outside of the norm? Most often, nothing.
Greatness is setting ambitious goals that your former
self would have thought impossible, and trying to get a little better
every day.
I absolutely think podcasts are a great way to “surround”
yourself with people who can help you average up. I use podcasts this
way, and I listen to Dan Carlin (Hardcore History), Jocko, Sam, and Tony
regularly myself.
Regarding getting out
of funks and dips in your life, you might find this article of mine
helpful, titled “Productivity Tricks for the Neurotic, Manic-Depressive,
and Crazy (Like Me)“.
When — despite your best efforts — you feel like you’re
losing at the game of life, remember: Even the best of the best feel
this way sometimes.
Pure hell forces action, but anything less can be endured with enough clever rationalization.
Learn from your mistakes until you succeed. It’s that simple.
When I’m in the pit of despair, I recall what iconic
writer Kurt Vonnegut said about his process: “When I write, I feel like
an armless, legless man with a crayon in his mouth.”
Role models who push us to exceed our limits, physical
training that removes our spare tires, and risks that expand our sphere
of comfortable action are all examples of eustress—stress that is
healthful and the stimulus for growth.
With routines, you don’t want your threshold for
“success” to be checking 100% of the boxes. Look for 3/5 wins or 2/5
wins. Otherwise, the human inclination is self-sabotage with “Well, I
miss A or B, so I failed today,” or “Now today is going to be harder”
and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
On how to get over analysis paralysis: set deadlines for
decisions (put them in your calendar or they aren’t real) and break
large intimidating actions/projects into tiny mini-experiments that
allow you to overcome fear of failure.
Sometimes it pays to model the outliers, not flatten them into averages. This isn’t limited to business.
Every time I find myself stressed out, it’s because I do things primarily driven by growth.
I encourage active skepticism – when people are being
skeptical because they’re trying to identify the best course of action.
They’re trying to identify the next step for themselves or other people.
I discourage passive skepticism, which is the armchair
variety where people sit back and criticize without ever subjecting
their theories or themselves to real field testing.
My perfect storm was nothing permanent. But of course
it’s far from the last storm I’ll face. There will be many more. The key
is building fires where you can. Warm yourself up as you wait for the
tempest to pass. These fires, the routines, habits, relationships, and
coping mechanisms you built, help you to look at the rain and see
fertilizer instead of a flood. If you want the lushest green of life and
you do, the grey is part of the natural cycle. You are not flawed. You’re a human. You
have gifts to share with the world and when the darkness comes, when
you’re fighting the demons, just remember. I’m right there fighting with
you. You’re not alone. The gems I found were forged in the struggle.
Rehearsing the worst case scenarios or negative
visualization is a very powerful tool, which paradoxically allows you to
become more relaxed and therefore, more response-able, i.e., able to
chose your response if you get thrown a curveball question or if you
flub and make a mistake in the middle of a live broadcast.
Anyone you have in your mind as an icon is an imperfect, flawed creature, just like all humans on the planet.
